ABOUT STAFFORDSHIRE BLACK
The thing with About Us pages is that - like most other pages on the Internet - we could literally tell you anything and you wouldn't know whether it was true or not.
We could say that we're a team of past-our-prime former cheerleaders with a passion for dovetail joints, a trio of burly cellmates brewing concoctions in our prison toilet or just a bearded bloke in a shed, engaged in hand-to-hand combat with abnormally-large spiders and/or running screaming from wasps while his amazing wife offers moral support, IT assistance and bacon sandwiches.
So, with that in mind, here are 10 'facts' about Staffordshire Black, only nine of which are actually true:
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We're in Staffordshire, England. This shouldn't come as a surprise.
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Our names are Murray and Dawn.
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Murray is a Sanddancer (a more localised version of a generic Geordie) and Dawn, who only has her photo taken if she's hiding behind a wine glass, is a Yam-Yam. Google will help you with both of those terms if you're wondering.
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One of us is a woodturner of dubious ability and the other makes a proper living by doing something incredibly boring with numbers and spreadsheets.
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After hanging around for a couple of years, the idea of Staffordshire Black was dragged kicking and screaming into reality in spring 2020 thanks to the UK's first COVID-19 lockdown (the one that most people stuck to... with some important and well-documented exceptions), furlough and a shortage of decent things to watch on Netflix. The actual launch came in late summer.
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SB-HQ is surrounded by lots of privately-owned mature woodland (see above pic), providing all of the natural and sustainable raw materials for our juices - with the landowner's permission, of course.
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We really do care what you think about our products, so your constructive feedback would be very much appreciated. Please don't make us beg (or cry). You can contact us here.
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Finding 10 things to list is much harder than it should be.
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This is the ninth fact.
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We get 60 minutes in the yard every day, where we practice with our pom-poms, and it's lights out at 10.30pm sharp.
Click these links for some really, really dull but legally-compliant info about Staffordshire Black's Privacy Policy, Terms of Service and our Returns & Refunds stuff.